When Kevin was in China he was placed in a foster home 6 months before we got there. He had to go back to the orphanage 2 wks before we traveled to get him. We watched him walking with his nanny outside, just like a typical day for him. He was curious when she was trying to tell him, this is Mama and Baba. Our boy is smart, even at 2 1/2 he knew SUDDENLY that it was all about to change. When he began to cry, it was as if he was saying, "Not ANOTHER change.....just leave me where I am" It was as plain as the nose on his cute face. He was gently swayed with magical goldfish crackers and bubbles that make all tears disappear. It didn't hurt that some of his dear friends from the same place were there with him. I think somehow they all summoned strength from each other. We had older children in our travel group that understood, but still took lots of time to comfort the smaller ones, that had become their families. They understood that they wouldn't be going back and still had something left in their hearts to help out the smaller ones, when new mommies and daddies couldn't make it better.....yet.
Our boy has grown and challenged us so much since he became part of our family. He still contines to adore and prefer his father, but he does understand about the love of a Mother. He still doesn't like us to wear shoes in the house (mostly a habit from the foster family and Chinese culture, but he also equates shoes with leaving) but is becoming ok with staying with one parent. I adore his heart so much, it is guarded still, but so willing to love again. He adores his sisters and follows them everywhere. The Lord knew what he was doing when he directed me to the waiting children website. He has led us through dark times and rewarded us for our patience and understanding. I loooooove my boy, but certainly glad year 1 is under our belts.
He has a Wuxi special haircut because of mishaps with the shears....ooooppppppssssss
Every call has a beginning. A quiet moment when God whispers a promise to a mother’s heart . A holy place where a father bows and faithfully accepts the journey set before him. A miraculous morning that unexpectedly dawns… Casting its first light on a chosen threshold. A gentle knock..a closed door opens, a sacred invitation sent by the Father.. leads to the other side of the world. Where lonely hearts stare out orphanage windows praying for someone to care.. and then one morning, on an ordinary day an orphan’s life changes... God sends them a second chance...Through you..
We are a family now, a whole,of which you are a part,and you are just as much our child as any in our heart. We do not love you differently,nor would we give up less of all that life has given us to bring you happiness.There is no limit to our love,no boundary you might cross,no price you may be asked to pay,no need to fear its loss. We are now one, the five of us,windows of one home. As long as we have life and breath,You’ll never be alone.~Nicholas Gordon
If I had my child to raise all over again,I’d build self-esteem first, and the house later.I’d finger-paint more, and point the finger less.I would do less correcting and more connecting.I’d take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.I’d take more hikes and fly more kites.I’d stop playing serious, and seriously play.I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars.I’d do more hugging and less tugging.~Diane Loomans, from “If I Had My Child To Raise Over Again
Thousands of starfish washed ashore. A little girl began throwing them in the water so they would not die. “Don’t bother, dear,” her mother said, “it won’t make a difference.” The girl stopped for a moment and looked at the starfish in her hand. “It will make a difference to this one."
Please consider adoption....it will make a difference to one child.